Jealousy eats into me when I least expect it.

So yeah. As the title says, "jealousy eats into me when I least expect it." I mean...sometimes, I get jealous at how people seem to be able to handle life so easily, as if nothing's disrupting them and that they're perfectly fine. I get jealous at how free they look and how happy they can get just because they don't have problems in their hearts nor minds. I get jealous knowing how simple-minded and innocent and oblivious they are. I get jealous of the fact that girls out there are prettier than me. I get jealous at how girls can act cute and be cute whenever they please just because they pose something cute like a twist.

I get jealous knowing that other girls have boyfriends who will love them enough to apologize and give in first during a quarrel. In fact, I get jealous at almost any friend who has a boyfriend, unless he's a jerk. I get jealous at knowing how people are smarter than me. I get jealous at knowing how people are better than me. I get jealous at even knowing the fact that people are older than me, which means that I have to give in to them. I get jealous knowing how imperfect and flawed I am compared to others. I get jealous knowing that people like them can be nominated as student councilors while I can't. Yes, I'm jealous. Because right now, I'm just a P.E Leader who serves under people like Karamjit.

I want to have fun like how the student councilors do. Or rather, like how YuLiang and Wendy and how the friendly and awesome ones do. I want to be like them. And I want to have fun like how Ingrid and Jolene and the rest do, in the Chinese Orchestra committee. Even though they whine a lot sometimes, deep down, I know they do like it. Even if it carries great responsibilities. And honestly, I've no rants about being a P.E Leader, and I definitely don't regret being one. I got to help out at events like Sports Day, ACES Day, FunFit duty, and went out of school to Hwa Chong Institution last year and even went to the ASEAN games this year as an athlete martial and scorer! :>

I don't regret meeting people like ChinMing, Jordan, WenXiang, Sandra, Hafizah, Jazz, ZongXiang, Hendra and all the other awesome people there. And to tell you the truth, if I could, I'd love to be a P.E Leader for all my four years in this school; I'm willing to serve the school to be a better person like how Wendy and Christie were! Even if I don't get to be a student councilor, I'm contented to be a student leader of the student body.