He texted me today. He did. But it wasn't pleasant.
He told me, "Hey, the only way for you to forget about me is to erase everything you know about me. Good luck to you in school..." Everything just crashed. Everything. Just...kaboom. Gone, poof. Fuck. Then I cried in the car, for a little while, but I didn't make a sound. So I was kinda' like sobbing. The tears just fell.. Then I saw him for the first period of the day; P.E. Had to measure height and weight, I was 160cm at 51kg. I don't know about him.. And I saw him slacking and playing around with his friends. His friends looked at me. He was having fun. I pretended like I was, too. It was the only thing I could have done, to laugh and smile like a cheerful retard when deep down I just feel like whacking everyone and tearing everything apart. It hurts. All of it. So much. So I've decided to give myself 60 days of a break, to stop thinking of him. And then, when I have the mood, hopefully I can go up to him once more, one more time, and say "hi". With a broad smile, with my feelings gone. But, can I? (...) Nearly used the sharp mathematical instruments to hurt myself today, if it wasn't for MinHao. Perseverance. Just don't know how to survive now, on my own..
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